Time Out for Women Notes

Time out for Women was great again this year. Here are some of the notes and highlights I wrote down. These are not direct quotes or written word for word.

Dean Hughes was my favorite speaker. He talked a lot about self talk and success in life. He is very down to earth and funny:
Life is defined too often as a competition. Why do we get so carried away with comparing ourselves to others around us? When we sense that we are becoming more like Jesus Christ is when we are happiest. He talked about how there was a survey among the general population asking them to rank themselves as drivers. Most people ranked themselves as an above average driver. When asked to rank how others drive, they ranked most drivers as below average. Do we do that in our lives with everything? We think we are above average and judge others as below average and go through life with anger in our hearts. We are less patient with others because we have already prejudged them as someone who will waste our time. For example we can get upset while we are standing in line at the store and the person in front of us pulls out a check and takes forever writing it. We need to make a key phrase we can say to ourselves at times like these to calm our minds and to remember who we want to be and how we want to treat others (not with anger and resentment). Dean Hughes uses the phrase "this is one of those times". He says this when he gets stressed and it calms him and helps him to pull back from the situation and re assess. And try to make his attitude and actions more like the saviors. After doing this the spirit will reassure you that you are doing the right thing and becoming more like the person you want to be.

Often times we feel that when someone does well in something that it takes something away from us. He used a hummingbird example. He puts out food for the birds and their are a few different feeders but once one hummingbird is at one, all the other ones will fight for it. Are we like that? We think sometimes that there is only so much friendship to go around, or so much prestige, so much love of God even. Life is not a contest. Be happy for others! What will be important to the Lord in the end is who we have become not the things we think we have aquired or been better at than someone else.

Do we turn others into our enemies? Over political matters or anything. These feelings eat at us and destroy us. Try to see the other person's perspective when we feel we are being attacked. He gives an example of how he felt attacked by a co-worker and so he decided to ask around about this person. One student told him that this "enemy" of his gave him his watch because he didn't have one. Dean thought this was a really generous and kind thing to do so he held onto this thought and every time this "enemy" of his upset him he would think about that watch and how he gave it away and it would soften his feelings toward this man. He said they never became best friends or anything but he was able to rid that anger, that was damaging his soul. This was the most important thing. We get uptight because we are so busy. Calm yourself with a phrase. The Lord and the Holy Ghost can change us more than we can change ourselves. Be softer, listen to the spirit. Think of what matters most. Let things go that are hurtful and make you angry.
LOVE< LOVE< LOVE that talk. And that man. He is wonderful.
Super tired tonight. I will post more tomorrow! To be continued.....(:

Aunt Mandy visit

My beautiful baby sister and her baby Bobby, whoa that was a lot of B's! Came out to visit us! Yay! We haven't even seen each other in almost 2 years. Our babies are only a month apart which is fun. It's her first baby and my (I'm pretty sure) last.


The boys kept busy. It was funny, Clark didn't seem to even notice Bobby much. He got super excited to see my sister every day but he didn't really see Bobby until Bobby was crawling on top of him or playing with a toy he wanted. Bobby is super mobile. He crawls really well, I can't even picture Clark being like that yet. He doesn't like to be on his belly at all.

The boys playing again. It was so fun to watch them together.

Bianca was a good helper with the babes and made sure they each had an equal amount of toys.

The babies are out of it in this pic! Too funny! This was before church.


My other sister also came out to visit with her 3 kids. Here they are waiting for Bianca's bus. I love this picture!

Wyatt just loves his cousin Isaiah, he's so crazy around him! But they have a lot of fun together. The girls are just little dolls.

And I'm hoping to get a pic of all three of us girls from my sister to add to this post. It was so nice to be together, even if it was only for a little while. Love you Sistas!

Bianca, Bottles, Bedtime, Bucket, Beets and Battlestar Galactica

I've been thinking a lot about doing hard things. How being a parent forces you to watch and push your children to do hard things and it's not fun! I can't imagine how hard it must be for Heavenly Father to watch his children struggle, even knowing the trials that are ahead of them and gently nudges them to keep going, so that they can overcome. In one of my favorite scriptures Jesus tells his apostles, "In the world ye shall have tribulation, but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world” (John 16:33) It gives me hope. He has overcome it all, and he can help us do that too. Although we may not be able to overcome all things in this lifetime.

My first instinct when my children are going through a hard time is to remove them from the situation, to take the stressor away. But that isn't always the answer. When I think back on trials I've had I've been frustrated that the Lord doesn't just take them away! Now I see that although some trials do remain with me, I am able to handle them better. In the Book of Mormon there was a group of people suffering from some hard trials and God said to them:

“I will … ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that … you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions.

“And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethren were made light; yea, the Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord."

I know as I trust in the Lord, he shows his confidence in me and strengthens me. I think that's something that I'm bad at as a parent. Eric tells me that I need to exhibit more confidence in Bianca. (She's going through a tough time right now, explained below.) I need to work on that. I just want to rescue her instead I need to strengthen and support her. Let her know she can do something even if it's hard and she will be better for it. With the right foundation she's not going to break, she's going to be built up. We decided to say a prayer every morning before she leaves for school so we can both feel better about the day.

The challenge below may seem small but it's just been one of many challenges lately that have made me think about these things.

So the story with B. She was so excited to start school and see her friends again. The first day she was up and ready at 6:30 and couldn't wait to get to the bus stop.
This is her first week and it's totally different. She tells me she cries everyday at school. She misses the crafts she used to do in Kindergarten and she hasn't been eating her lunch because lunchtime makes her miss home. ): Today I picked her up from school and took her to McDonalds as a reward for eating even a little at school. It's hard for her but hopefully she will overcome this with time. I don't like the idea of her going all day without eating so I give her a big breakfast and have food ready for her when she comes home.

She wanted her hair curled for her first day:

Her and Wy being silly while waiting for the bus.

Bucket ,Bottle: Clark has thrush again, and so do I. I think we've had it most of his life unfortunately. I got so upset about it that I decided I was going to switch him to a bottle. He wouldn't take it so I basically didn't feed him until he would. It was a terrible day and I was much more emotional about it than I have ever been really about anything. Which led me to believe that I wasn't ready to stop nursing and he definitely was upset about it as well. Yeah, he finally took a bottle that night because he was so hungry but it wasn't satisfying to anyone. So I decided to take it slower and keep trying different bottle nipples, and sippie cups, which he takes better than any bottle. I might just go straight to the sippie cup at this point.

Bedtime: Bedtime is usually hectic I think in any household so I'm not saying ours is perfect but I do love when everyone gets in the bed together for stories. Clark loves this time as well. I can just tell by his face and he gets so relaxed and cuddles with Eric and Bianca. It's really fun.


And I just had to say beets and battlestar bc I'm cool like that. Shyeaaah, (:.

Musical Beds

I can't remember the last time I slept a full 8 hrs. and woke up in my own bed. When Eric and I were newlyweds he commented regularly on how amazed he was at how much I slept. I was used to a 9 hour block. And oh how I treasured that time. I had learned to appreciate sleep on my mission when I went to bed every night at 10:00 and woke at 6:00 and considered myself extremely sleep deprived. Little did I know what was ahead of me.

I'm not just cranky when I don't get sleep, I turn, or used to turn Evil. Eric says I've gotten a lot better about getting less sleep. I think I've just given up. I have a friend who says that God knows how she is about getting her sleep so he blessed her with good sleepers. Did he overlook me?! ):

Clark was sleeping awesome, and then he turned 5 months. I don't know what it was. Maybe because he became more aware of his surroundings? He used to wake up once to have a quick bite and sleep till morning. Now he's up at least 3 times fussing. I don't feed him more than once but I've got to get up and rock him or give him his pacifier. And the other night he just plain wanted to play.

The baby unfortunately is not the only bad sleeper in this house. Wyatt wakes up when he hears thunder or anything resembling thunder like an airplane. We did the white noise thing but he still hears it. So after many sleepless nights in our room we put his mattress in Bianca's and he's been OK in there for the most part. Bianca also likes to get up at night and randomly get in our bed. She doesn't say why, she just gets in. And this is where the music starts. About a month ago, around the 4th of July, Wyatt was afraid of the fireworks. He got up and ran in our bed. So I naturally went to his bed and let him sleep with Eric. Then Bianca got up and got in Wyatt's twin bed with me for whatever reason. I got up and went to her bed. As soon as I fell asleep Clark started to fuss. I went in and gave him his pacifier and turned him on his side. When I went back in to Bianca's bed Wyatt was in there looking for me. I let him come in the bed with me and we fell asleep. Then I got up to feed Clark and went back to my bed for an hour, then it was morning. When Eric got up and told me he was tired I wanted to punch him. It's not his fault he can sleep through almost anything.

I look forward to the night that I can go to bed and stay there. When I can wake up on my own and not because someone is crying. I look forward to feeling like my brain is working correctly again, and that I can tackle the obstacles that come my way. Because when I'm tired like this I see them coming and just want to cry instead. And I'm sure when those days finally get here I'll miss my little ones. I'll miss forgiving them for all the little things they did that day that drove me crazy when I see their sweet sleeping faces. I'll miss them cuddling up next to me to feel safe even if it did keep me awake sometimes. It's just that right now that seems so far away......

Another mouth surgery

My sister and I were talking last week over the phone about things that were going on with us and after sharing our various health issues I made the comment that we sounded like a couple old ladies. We are only in our 30's! But it seems like we both have been having more health problems than ever before.

Thank goodness it nothing serious but it looks like I will need another minor surgery. I kind of knew this one was coming and I thought I was doing everything I could to avoid it but it turns out that I didn't know the real "root" of the problem. Get it, root, cuz it's in my tooth. haha. OK I know I'm lame but hey at least I make myself laugh. So back to the problem. See below.



You see how far the gum has recessed on the one tooth. I have a permanent retainer on my lower teeth which I thought was causing the recession since that gum area under it doesn't get excercised when I eat so I've been super diligent about flossing it daily. Only recently did the dental hygenist tell me that the recession was not because of lack of flossing but that it was due to the attachment from my lip to my gums being too short. Basically every time I talk it pulls on those lower gums, pulling them away from the teeth. I wish I would have known that sooner and I could have just gotten it clipped but since I didn't I will be getting not only a clip but a skin graft. Usually this entails the scraping off of tissue from the roof of the mouth and pasting of that skin underneath the gums. You can see why I've been avoiding this like the plague. I've seen patients afterwards ( I was a dental assistant for 4 years) and it is not pretty and they always told me how painful it was.

When I went into the periodontist for this evaluation I told him I was really not looking forward to this particular surgery. He then told me the good news!!! Just barely, this November I think, the ADA came up with a synthetic collagen that can take the place of the skin on the roof of the mouth, eliminating the need to take your own skin off. I was super excited when I heard about this. So what he will do is cut the gums under those two front bottom teeth, place the collagen there, stitch it up and it's done! Cool. Still not looking forward to it but glad there is an alternative to the scraping of the roof of my mouth. So if any of you have recession problems out there. Try to get to the "root" of it sooner than later so you can avoid my fate! I'll put some after pics for you too.

The trash collectors

I don't have much time to write this post, I know big surprise. So it is void of any pictures or examples but I've been meaning to write about this for a while and I don't want to forget so here goes....

My kids (and husband) are trash collectors. Not of gross used diapers or old food or anything but almost of anything else. When Eric and I first got married I remember him taking things out of the trash that I had thrown away and asking me why I threw it out, be it clothes, knick knacks, old CD's, anything. I thought it was the most bizarre thing. Like, why would he look in the trash in the first place? I never do. I just throw my trash away, eww I don't want to look in there. Anyway I've kind of gotten used to it now. In fact, I'm sure he already knows this but if I don't want him to know I've thrown something away I make sure to put something else on top of it in the trash so he won't see it. Sometimes I forget. Like today for example I threw away some old Easter eggs, the plastic kind because they had been through a bunch of hunts and Easters and I had bought some new ones so I thought, out with the old. Three minutes later he was asking me why I had thrown them out. Ugh.

I am so out with the old all the time. In this way Eric and I are opposites. When I buy a new shirt, I go through my old clothes and get rid of ones I don't wear anymore, I'm sure you're getting the point by now. Well, this was all fine and dandy. Eric and I came to an understanding of each other. Then we had kids. I NEVER thought this could be genetic but they both totally do it. Bianca hates it when I throw things away. She's constantly pulling things out of the trash. Old ribbons from packages, even boxes from amazon shipments. The reason I thought to do this post was because when I went to get her pajamas out today I found an old box I had told her to get rid of hiding behind her dresser. Little turkey! What is it about these things? I know Eric hates to waste and puts sentimental value on "things" more than I do, now our kids do this as well. I thought at least Wyatt was a man after my own heart. If you don't use it, get rid of it. Not so. The other day I put one of the many pictures he draws into the trash, he pulled it out and said, "Mommy, why did you throw my picture away!?" I gave the same answer I give to Bianca and Eric on occasion, "Oh, I'm sorry, it must have fallen in!" Some of you may be thinking this is mean but C'mon! You can't keep everything, right!?
Now I have come to an understanding of the children as well and spend many nights cleaning up school papers (aka, throwing them out) after the kids are in bed. That being said, I do keep a lot still and definitely have my scrapbooks and baby books full of memorabilia, including pictures from Wyatt. At least when they look back on those when they're older they will be happy those ones didn't get thrown away, they will probably remember them too! These people! Ha!

CuraZEE

CRAZY, that's how the days have been. This boy is such a blessing in our lives! Having a third baby however definitely keeps me busier than before. I'll get more into that in a few.

Update on Clark is he's a SUPER baby. At his one month check up he weighed in at 8 lbs. 8 oz. which was amazing to me considering his birth weight was 6 pounds. He has had no major or minor health problems and is a joy to have around. He is just starting to be awake more often now for longer periods of time. He looks around when he hears his brother and sister and enjoys it when they show him their toys, include him in a game ect. Just kidding about that last part.

Ugh, I look so tired here, but look at that babe! I can already tell he's gonna be a Mama's boy.

Love it that I can put him down about anywhere and he falls asleep. That won't be lasting much longer I'm sure.

The kids are always asking if they can hold him and they do a great job at helping out. They are always running to the rescue with his pacifier when he cries.

Now to the craziness. I am nursing Clark, which takes about 40 minutes at a time. The kids are used to me being a little more mobile. Now that I am sitting so much they have to keep themselves occupied more often which leads to lovely projects such as money arrangements: I call this one "A penny for your thoughts."

Proof of the pacifier plugging. This is Wyatt's doing, Clark didn't seem to mind it though. (It's upside down).

Maybe I should have started sitting around sooner, Bianca has taken to doing the dishes while I nurse...
And poor Wy, I think he gets bored a lot. His new hobby: taping papers around the house. This one is on the pantry. As a good friend of mine once said, "My children are artists and my house is their canvas."
This is pretty much how we roll: Get up at 7:00 am. Feed the babe. Feed the kids, have breakfast. Get Wy ready for school. While baby is napping get myself and B dressed. Feed babe. Pick up Wy from school. Baby naps, do homework with B. Play a little with Wy. Feed baby. Get lunch, get B ready for school. Feed baby. Try to take a quick nap while Wy watches tom and jerry and B is at school. Feed baby. Make dinner, feed baby while Eric gives the kids their bath. Put kids down. Still have the house to clean up, laundry to put away ect. and I'm pooped! Thank goodness Eric helps with those things. Life is good, but so busy! Love to all of you, if I don't return your call right away I may be doing one or more of the above things. (:

Baby Story

These past two weeks have been a whirlwind! Eric and I knew this baby would come early, we just weren't expecting it to be so early! Technically, Clark was just 36 weeks when my water broke. They had to have a pediatrician there to check him right away when he was born. I had just packed the hospital bag the night before and was planning on washing all the baby clothes the next day. But when my water broke I knew right away what was happening and came and told Eric, who was getting ready for work. I think he thought I was kidding because I was so calm. I was just really matter of fact about it. That's how I get when I get nervous. I came down and told the kids I was going to have the baby today and that I would be fine. I called a neighbor to come over to stay with them and luckily she was able to come right away.

The weather was not snowy or icy, which was a blessing. The traffic wasn't bad. And I wasn't having any bad contractions. This may be TMI for some of you but I have to say that Depends really work! I put one on (we had some samples from Eric's couponing) instead of using a towel like I did with my last two babies. I didn't leak once, amazing. In fact I didn't want to take it off when I got to the hospital. So there's my Depends shout out.

They had us fill out a bunch of paperwork when we got there. I always think that's a strange time to do that. Like, can't you do it ahead of time, instead of when you are in labor! Then they got a monitor on me, I got my IV. I get nervous with needles and I know what I'm in for with the pregnancy but I still don't like it. I told the nurse this. She put the IV in my arm vs. my hand and it was awesome! It's so much nicer to have your hands free. She did a great job too bc somehow she took blood at the same time, out of my forearm, weird.

Then came the part I was dreading most, which went terribly. I have bad luck with epidurals. I wasn't in a ton of pain with my contractions yet. The anesthesiologist did his thing and I can't tell details cuz it gets me queasy. But him and the nurse assisting thought it didn't take, but then he was able to save it. Anyway, that was the worst part of the whole experience.

Then I went into the operating room, the Dr. got that babe out in like 10 minutes! I heard them all say he looks great and then they showed him to me. It was such a relief when they pulled him out. I was just hoping he would be OK since he was early. He had no health issues. Came out a champion feeder and has been home now for almost two weeks. I took him to his first Dr's appointment and the Dr. was surprised by his strength. He can almost roll over and has really strong muscle control in his head and neck. Eric and I thought, well he's gotta be strong, he has the name of a superhero and my favorite prophet, one of my spiritual hero's.

My recovery has been perfect! I didn't even have to take one pain pill. Just ibuprofen every 8 hours. I know how to take care of my incision since this is the third time and I haven't had any complications either.

The kids have been awesome. They love their brother, just wish he was awake more. I'm so glad they have each other. They've been keeping each other busy, playing. They are helpful. In the morning's Eric and I have been SOOO tired and they usually get up at 6:00. Well we told them that we needed them to read books in their room or play quietly before coming to wake us at 7:00. This morning Eric got up at 7:00 and went to find Wyatt in Bianca's bed and she was reading to him. Isn't that the sweetest thing! I love my kiddies and am SUPER grateful for the way everything has worked out.

We've had friends bring us meals. And offer to watch kids. And I want to thank my husband who has been Mr. Mom for the last two weeks, doing laundry, dishes, getting the kids to school and basically taking care of everything. Thank goodness for a helpful loving husband! And thank all my friends who are always so willing to help and share what they have. Thank you!

The 411

Today I had my 36 week appointment. Everything looks good with baby. I wish I could say the same for myself. I have laryngitis for the first time and a terrible cold that doesn't seem to want to leave.

Anyway this post is mostly to address some concerns/ questions/ doubts that people have been expressing about me having a third c-section. I know I don't have to justify my decision but I do want those who love me and are genuinly concerned to be able to understand.

The short answer is that it's the safest thing to do having already had two previous c-sections. Reason being that when you are in labor the uterus contracts and expands. Since my uterus has two incisions already they don't want it contracting and expanding too much for fear of a rupture of one of the incisions. Inducing labor is also a bad idea because pitocin is used to get the labor process going and that causes even harder contractions than in a normal labor.

I know of a woman who insisted on not having a 3rd c-section against her Dr's wishes and was successful, however no hospital would take her so she did it at home. Which I would never want to try either.

Some people might say that Dr's just do c-sections if there is any sign of distress and while that may be true for some it was not the case for my two previous ones. With Bianca my water broke, I was in labor for 21 hours. My body wasn't progressing naturally at all. They put me on pitocin. By that 21st hour they finally had me pushing and found that she was turned the wrong way and that part of my cervix was stuck over her head. They had to get her out, I think the max they feel comfortable waiting after water breaks is 24 hours. After that there is a serious risk of infection. I remember thinking going into that labor process that the ONE thing I did not want and would avoid at all costs was a c-section. But it came down to doing what was safest and in the best interest of the health of the baby and my health.

With Wyatt I planned to do a VBAC. The Dr. advise against using pitocin though if I wasn't progressing in case of uterine rupture. After 5 hours of labor it looked like it was going to be the same story. My body wasn't progressing naturally at all. The nurse asked me if I wanted pitocin. I was upset that she would even ask me that knowing what she did about the previous c-section but whatever. The Dr. wasn't there at the time and I told her I wanted to see him. He came in, we talked and he gave me the option of continuing to labor naturally or c-section again. I chose the c-section because I felt it was best and frankly didn't want to go through 20 more hours of labor only to end up having another c-section anyway.

Going into this delivery knowing that the decision has already been made takes a lot of stress off my shoulders. I remember with Wyatt trying to decide if I should go VBAC or c-section was a really hard choice. I'm still hoping that I go into labor by my water breaking early mostly because when they stick that needle in my back for the spinal I want to be in some kind of other pain to take my mind off of that. I hate that part. But the surgery really isn't too bad. It's weird because you are awake. They put a cloth in front of you so you don't have to watch and you can hear the Dr's talking and you can feel pressure but no pain. It's kind of cool when they take the baby out, they will say, OK you are going to feel a big pull, or something like that and then you hear a cry and some cheers. The downsides are that I can't hold the baby right away but the Dr. will show him to me, then they take him and clean him up. They stitch me up, take me back to the room and I can hold him. The other thing that is kind of a bummer is I have to stay in the hospital at least two nights. That's always been hard for me to be away from Bianca but I'm hoping this time my stay will go well and I will be able to get some rest and use the nursery. I've never used it before.

Hopefully that explains some things. When the time comes I'll post how everything goes. It should be happening soon and we are excited to see our new baby boy Clark.

Meals for Mommies

It's that time again for submitting recipes at http://mealsformommies.blogspot.com/!
The last couple of years I've received some great ones that have made my life much easier as a Mom and given us more variety for dinner time. Please submit via email to lhall1977@gmail.com so I can add yours to the website. Thank you and may we all continue to cook dinner for our families, even when we don't feel like it. (;

PLS - pregnant lady syndrome

Irritability, fatigue, impatience, depression, and a general feeling of being uncomfortable in your own skin is what I would call PLS. People have been asking me how I feel lately and my response has been "pretty good" which isn't a total lie. This pregnancy has been good compared to the last two but it's still a pregnancy nonetheless.

Today I looked at the one dress that still fits me while getting ready for church and decided against it. I made it to the church building and then had to come home and change because the skirt I chose was cutting off my circulation.
So how am I really feeling? Like I'm suffering from PLS. I feel like a penguin when I walk, am constantly peeing, and can no longer shave my legs but lately the hormone thing has been the biggest issue.

I took the kids to McDonalds the other day to play at the little play place they have and to have some lunch. Toward the end of our time there I began taking trash to the trashcan. My purse and the kids toys and drinks were still on the table. YET some guy with his almost teenage kid came over and sat down and said "are you leaving now?" My answer was, "apparently". I was really mad! But what could I say? We were getting ready to leave, it was crowded, but I am pregnant! You're really going to take a pregnant woman's seat, how lame are you? (By the way they already had seats but for some reason were coveting seats in the play area). So now I have the kids drinks, toys, leftovers, in my hands and have to bend down to get their shoes back on so we can leave. It ruined my morning. I usually don't get upset about little things and if I do I get over it pretty quickly. Not since I've been pregnant.

Let's end this on a positive not though. I have a healthy baby boy coming soon! My water broke two weeks early with the last two children so even though I have a planned c section I'm hoping the same thing will happen with him. Eric and I are ready. At least with this one we feel ready. I'm getting a little nervous for the surgery/recovery and the lack of sleep but other than that I am really excited to meet my little guy. I'm also excited to see how the other two kids interact with him. With Wyatt I felt like Bianca was still so young that I was neglecting her a little bit to take care of him. I think Wyatt is independent enough to be OK with a little less attention from me. We aren't having any family come out so we are looking for volunteers who we can call to come stay with the kids while I am in surgery and in the hospital for 3 days. Please let me know if you would be willing and able to help. Thanks! Oh, and I promise I'll be nice to you because the PLS will be OVER! (:

Thankful

This past week I've just been thinking about things I'm grateful for and don't take for granted. I thought I would note a few: these are not in a certain order....

• That I can put my kids to bed and they will go to sleep on their own. This may sound simple, for our kids it hasn't been until now.
• For my health
• For the gospel. Without it I think I would be a very different person. For me it's like a life jacket that keeps my head above water and keeps me from going under when the waves crash down on me.
• That my hub takes me out to dinner to places I like frequently and that when we eat at home most of the time he does the dishes. woot woot!
  
• For naps
• To be a Mom
• For my 2 beautiful healthy children and for the one on the way
• That my husband is so good at taking care of us and is really good at saving money with his coupon hobby
• For music, it makes life so much more enjoyable
• For good friends and good examples
• For pintos and cheese from taco bell and nectarines. These have been my staples since the pregnancy.
• That I had the opportunity to serve a mission. It was pretty challenging but I learned so much about the gospel and about myself.
  
• For good books and life stories that people share
• For Jack Handy and his deep thoughts that make me laugh every time I read them
  

Freak, calm down!

My sister has been begging me for months to put a belly pic up. I always did this with the last two babes but haven't been AS excited to do it with this one for some reason. haha. So here you go Mando: 26 wks.

Church Responds to HRC Petition

After our General Conference this past month my husband told me that some people were upset by what was said by one of the apostles. In fact there is a group right now on facebook regarding this upset which reads as follows:

"After General Conference, the media descended upon President Packer with negative publicity and misinterpretation of his speech. It was said that over 100,000 letters were delivered to him on Tuesday in protest to his talk. For those who might have been misinformed on what he said, we invite you to read/listen to his entire talk."

Link to his talk: http://lds.org/conference/sessions/display/0,5239,23-1-1298,00.html

I read something recently that was much more articulate than I could be about the Church's official stand on the matter. Here is the link to that: http://beta-newsroom.lds.org/article/church-mormon-responds-to-human-rights-campaign-petition-same-sex-attraction

This is one of my favorite parts of what was said:

"God’s universal fatherhood and love charges each of us with an innate and reverent acknowledgement of our shared human dignity. We are to love one another. We are to treat each other with respect as brothers and sisters and fellow children of God, no matter how much we may differ from one another.

We hope and firmly believe that within this community, and in others, kindness, persuasion and goodwill can prevail."

I'm grateful for the Church's stand on this position and hope to be able to spread it however I can. And to those who were offended by the misunderstanding... I pray their hearts will be softened and these protests put to rest.

Because of this issue I recently came upon a very inspirational blog. The writer is a gay Mormon and expresses his feelings about the talk that Packer gave as well: See link below:

http://gaymormonguy.blogspot.com/2010/10/president-packers-talk-from-gay-mormon.html

This is a must read and a great source of encouragement and strength for those of you who have same sex attractions but want to become or stay a member of the Church.

It's a boy!

I know this is going to be a disappointment to some of you but we are not having a baby goat. ):

We all went to the ultrasound in hopes for a baby girl, except for Wyatt. The technician looked at everything else first and then finally got to the sex and it's a boy! We are very happy, especially that everything looks healthy with the baby. We had a little bit of a shock because we were expecting a girl. Why were we expecting this? Because since Wyatt was born Eric talked about how there was a girl named Sunny in heaven waiting to come to our family. I got pregnant so fast after going off of birth control (like in one week) that I thought for sure this was her. Now that we know it isn't we keep thinking, "Did we just make her up? was she wishful thinking? or some kind of idea from the spirit? We haven't figured it out yet but I can tell you that I know that this BOY is meant to be in our family. And so we are excited. As for names we both really like the name Clark. It's not set in stone but it came to my mind a few days before the ultrasound.

Ultrasound

So the date is arriving quickly now when we'll find out the sex of the baby. We are so excited! October 4th is the Ultrasound. Just for fun I put a little poll to the right if you want to fill it out. (:

Winner

I won my first contest ever! Eric seems to win things all the time but no matter how many times I've entered things I haven't won, until now!! Yay!

Here is the link to it: http://gettingswimsuitready.blogspot.com/2010/07/im-hosting-giveaway.html

Hopefully next time you see me I'll look a little tanner! Woot, woot!

The good the bad and the ugly

I wouldn't say that I'm much of a complainer by nature. Usually when I encounter a challenge I just kind of put my head down and power through (like George Michael Sr. says). I do however like to look at things logically and try to figure them out. The only time I start to whine and complain is when the problem isn't getting better or going away despite my greatest efforts to overcome it. My hope in writing this post is to prove to myself that the good does in fact outweigh the bad and the ugly even though I am feeling so defeated.

So here is the good: I'm pregnant with what looks like so far a healthy baby.

The bad: I feel like crap. I have to make myself eat every two hours so I don't throw up and still I want to throw up but then I don't because I know that won't help me feel better. With my last two pregnancies this nausea lasted 7 months. Just knowing that I may feel this way for a long time to come depresses me.

The ugly: I'm just not myself. I've stopped playing with my kids for the most part, don't make dinner bc the evening is when I'm the sickest, don't hang out with friends, can barely keep up with the house chores, and just want to sleep all day so the time passes quickly, also because that's the only time I don't feel sick is when I'm asleep.

I keep praying, every night that by some miracle the nausea won't last past the first trimester. I also repent every night for being such a baby about all of this. It's not like this pregnancy is any worse than the other two. The difference is I was working with the other two so I guess I just got used to forcing myself to get to work and I focused on other things. At home it's easier to get stuck inside my own problems. Also, making food all the time for the kids and myself is just driving me crazy! And for those of you who have kids, you know they take a lot of energy. I try to plan something every day where they can play and have fun so they won't see me moping around all day.

But I want to look at the positives.... my husband has been 100% more supportive during this pregnancy than he was with the last two. Not because he didn't want to be before, I just think he didn't really get it. I don't look terribly ill (hopefully). I can still get up and do things for the most part. And when I was going to work he didn't see me throwing up all day and all that. He's just more compassionate this time. He doesn't get mad at me for not making dinner, and more than that he doesn't complain. He just makes something for himself. He's been picking up so much of the slack in the housework. He does the dishes, laundry, cleans up the house, organizes, does the grocery shopping. Which I'm so grateful for. He encourages me, by telling me that this is the last time I have to do this. (: And that we're going to have a beautiful baby, and the time will go by faster than I think. I really, really need to hear all of these things.

My kids have been playing well together. They normally fight, then watch tv or eat, then fight again. But lately since I've backed off a little more with the playing aspect, they've come up with things to play together, like they take care of their stuffed animals and play doctor with them. They've even started to clean up the house on their own! With a little help from the "clean up music" that they've discovered from their new keyboard. One thing that's made me smile lately is the conversations they have when they think I'm not listening. They are just about little things like knots in hair. But they make me smile and make me grateful for these little people in my life.
There it is in a nutshell, the good the bad and the ugly. Looks like the good does outweigh it all, which it usually does when you take time to write it all out, so I'm glad that I did.

So what can I learn from all of this.... How to empathize with those who have chronic pain or illnesses.? To not take feeling good for granted? How to rely more on the Lord on a daily basis? Maybe all of these things. If I can learn something to help me in the future from all of this then that is another positive.

Best Laid Plans

It's happened again. I made a plan, I thought it was a good one. It was an important one, a well thought out one. I thought I was sticking to it, with only a minor tweaking, when Heavenly Father apparently already had something else in mind. Can't He tell me these things BEFOREhand. It makes me think of one of my favorite lines on "The Wedding Singer" the day after he gets left at the altar and his fiance comes to see him and tells him a couple of reasons why she stood him up and he replies, "Information that would have been helpful to know YESTERDAY!"
Anyway here was the plan: Eric and I made a decision to have another baby, I put it off for about a year and then decided it was time, BUT, not until I went to Disneyland. We took the kids last year and they had a blast, a lot more fun than I thought they would considering thier young ages, really they loved every minute and have talked about going again the second we got home and throughout the year. So I thought let's go again now that they are older they'll enjoy it even more and I'll get to enjoy it without being sick and pregnant.
My sister called me in April and told me she was pregnant. To which my loving husband replied, "How come everyone gets pregnant except my wife." Irrrrrrr. That did not make me happy, but still I didn't budge, I thought, we're waiting. Then Eric and I talked about it again. My birth control pills were running out and we decided not to get a refill BECAUSE it took me about 5 months to get pregnant with Bianca and 8 months to get pregnant with Wyatt so I figured I was safe and I would give my body time to adjust from being off the birth control. Yeah...... so remember that post about how I wasn't sleeping and how I was having a hard time adjusting. I was pregnant. If I'm remembering correctly I think I must have gotten pregnant a couple of days after going off the birth control. I did go off of it a week early but still I thought I was safe.
So, we are leaving for CA to go to Disneyland this Sunday, and I am wanting to vomit every ten minutes. Lovely. By the way when I took the test and found out I was pregnant, I picked Wyatt up and swung him around, I was so happy. Then the familiar nausea set in, let's just say I'm glad this will be my last child. This time around I did get some zofran from the Dr. It's an anti-nausea medication. Mostly for the trip. Traveling with two small children is stressful enough without feeling crappy too. So wish me luck! I'm excited, worried, tired, and happy all at the same time. I'm not planning on planning anything else important again any time soon! Humph!

The new do

I got my hair cut last night, wanted to do something different. So here it is, I like it, but I'm still getting used to it. I really like how it lays, we'll see how it looks after I wash it. (;